Facebook Test

So this is a test to see if my blog is still importing to facebook. Which means, yes, I’m considering returning to the blog. If precedent holds, that means I’ll be posting regularly for about three months, sporadically for six more and then abdicate my blogging throne with no warning. Be prepared.

Quotes

Me: … Umm this is not what it looks like.

..Wait, does it look like someone pooped in the tub? Because then it is exactly what it looks like.

I am a delinquent!

So I realize I have been a little delinquent in posting on this blog. I realized this particularly when someone I do not know posted on my blog asking if I am alright, which made me feel kind of amazing (Wow, I have random people following me and concerned about my welfare!!) and a little crappy (wow, I am so delinquent, people worry about my safety!)

So here’s my flimsy excuse:  I have been up to oh so many things; among them, raising an 8-almost-9 month old–wait, how did that happen?- -and working on some “real” or “legit” writing projects (ie, a book of short stories I would like to someday get published because there are not nearly enough authors in this world trying to make it with thier substandard drivel!!1!), aaaaaaaaaaaaaand making the following video of my baby, entering in the Johnson’s Big Bubblin Stars Contest, and being selected as one of the finalists!

To view it, and to vote for us, (and please do!), go to http://www.youtube.com/baby, click the vote tab and give “Puppy Kisses and Bedtime Bubbles” a thumbs up!  You can vote once per day and the voting only goes until the 27th so we need all the help we can get 🙂

Also I am currently in GA visiting my crazy family, so here’s the deal.  As soon as I am back in my own digs and this voting craziness is over, I will get back to posting. With the dog blog Mondays and everything.  You’re so welcome.

Dog Blog Guide to Sun Care

Today it is 88° in the Chicago land area and Beau wants to remind you all to stay safe.  He offers these guidelines to enjoying the sun responsibly:

1.  Always wear sunscreen.  Protecting your skin is a big part of Beau’s maintenance routine.

2.  Don’t forget to protect your eyes.  Also good for looking stylish outdoors or like a douche indoors.

3. Find a good book and curl up on your comfy couch because it is just too damn hot out there.

This has been a Dog Blog Guide to Sun Care.  Tune in next week for “How to Survive a Baby Coming to Your House and Stealing all the Attention, also Trying to Poop on All Your Things.”

Super Pooper Extraordinaire!

Being that I have worked in two different zoos, I find it somewhat disconcerting that this little goo’s diaper pail…

is smelling more and more like the small mammal rooms.  I have refrained from provided pictorial proof (just barely) but let me assure you his poops are looking more and more like big kid poops.  boo for growing up.

He is almost 7 months, which seems impossible.  Here he is at the park, his first time in a swing, making his fat kid face:

Goo-cifer!

Dog Blog Monday #317

Since (which I pronounce “cents,” which is, apparently, wrong) I forgot it was Monday last week until, oh, I don’t know Wednesday or so, I am presenting a special dog blog three way!  (three photos that is… … wow.)

A friend sent me these adorable sock creatures for Sebastian and he loves them.  Turns out frog eyes are really good teethers.

If you love them, as I do, get your own here.  But they won’t be as cool as mine because your dog won’t wear them.

ps I don’t know who is more humiliated here, Beau or the frog…

question.

Is it offensive that one of my nicknames for Sebastian might be Booger T. Washington?

Yes or no?

Gandhi McPoopy Pants? Rosa Parks it in my Crib? Billy Graham Cracker?  Paul McFartyKnees? Malcolm X-tremely Cute?

Downward Facing Dog

I’m not quite sure this qualifies as yoga, but he does look very stoic…

ps – notice the high chair in the background!!

Inanity

The other day I was at what is possibly the best place ever – a little shop in Naperville called Cookie Dough Creations – where you can eat raw cookie dough, and get this! you don’t even get salmonella! (totally unrelated side note, but does anyone but me think salmonella just sounds like a fish putting on airs?? Stupid fancy she-fish.) Anyways, there I was minding my own business, shoving peanut butter cookie dough down my throat as fast as my little hands can, I mean, daintily enjoying some cookie dough, like a lady, when I overhear the following conversation:

(First some background, I overhear these four college students referring several times to buildings on campus leading me to deduce that they go to Wheaton College, the school that I, for better and worse, also attended.  Normally when I hear people speaking about Wheaton College I break out in hives and quickly duck the other way)

Girl #1: Do you guys know professor so-and-so?

Boy:  Yeah, he’s always working out at the fitness center!

Girl #1:  Yeah, and he’s always wearing those creepy widowers!

Girl #2:  Wait… what?

Girl #3: Hold up, I think you mean a black widow?

Girl #1:  Wait, no, a black widow is a spider, and I think a widower is too.  And a widower is also someone whose spouse died, what do you call those shirts?

Boy:  A wife beater?

Girls:  Oh, yeah!

Girl #2: That’s kind of a creepy name, besides what do they call them when girls wear them?

Boy:  When girls wear them, it’s just a tank top.

Girl #2:  Oh.

AND these are the quality people we are churning out of our liberal arts colleges.  Which means in a couple of years they will be applying for the same jobs as me, making me look awesome.  Hooray.

The wisdom of future summer

How I wish this afternoon had gone:

Self:  It would be a great idea to bounce Sebastian around on my shoulders for a while!

Future Self:  Except then he might spit up aaaaaaaaaaaaall over your head.

Self:  Good point.  Thanks, future self.